Sweet Without Much Substance

This is a bitch of a post to write but I'm on some sort of truth serum today so I must persist.

I love life in Orange County. I love being able to drive to the beach on a whim. I love that things are clean and orderly. I can't even remember the last time I saw a homeless person. (The rumor is that they're schlepped out of here if they get up the nerve to penetrate the Orange Curtain.) This is the greatest place I've ever lived when it comes to comfort and style. The perfect blend of metropolitan, beachy and suburban.

Orange County is all the things that I thought I wanted and all the things that put you in the carpool lane to complacency.

Don't get me wrong. I could live here forever and build up some sort of fun business and meet lots of fun people and have the random, charming, vaguely glamorous life I've dreamt about. It's already in the works.

The thing about it is, I'm starting to lose myself. I have accepted that conversations rarely involve deep introspection in my new habitat. I fear/feel that the only way I can bond with people here is by shutting off a certain part of my self. I don't really talk about spirituality or anything intellectual anymore. I dwell on it then I write about it here.

This morning I heard Lauren Conrad talking about her book with Ryan Seacrest (love that guy and I'm not ashamed to say it!). I pondered the title. LA Candy. What the hell does that mean?

Now I get it. I'm getting diabetes from OC candy over here. The question remains--will I continue to gorge even knowing the consequences or will I pick up that thousand pound phone and call Jenny Craig? Keeping the status quo is a decision. There's no denying that.